Friendships, Sadness and Strength

Do you ever really sit down and think about friendships and realize that some of your friendships are so strong that you just can’t imagine what life would be like without them? I find myself tonight reflecting upon a friendship and illness. I found out today that one of my lifelong friends has cancer. It is in the beginning stage and right now, we don’t have a lot of information. She will find out more later in the month as to the procedures and treatment that she will need to fight this awful disease. It sounds like since it was caught early, she shouldn’t die. But what if she does? I’ve been great friends with her almost my entire life. We’ve had so many conversations about raising families together, seeing our children grow up together, etc. I am deeply saddened that such a sweet person has to go through that battle and what she must be thinking in her head. I don’t want to be selfish but it makes me want to spend as much time as possible with her in case the worst happens. I’m trying to think positive and think that if someone is going to beat it, she will. She is one of the strongest women that I know. She’s always been there for me when I needed her and I’m going to be there for her. I don’t care what it takes. No one should go through that battle alone. I can’t even imagine what she must be going through, what she is thinking and what her fears are. I’m sure she’s scared and wondering why this has to happen to her? The cause of this kind of cancer is not known and apparently, the number of women with this cancer has grown drastically in the last 10 years.
I’ve never really had a close friend die. It’s always been an older family member, etc. So when I think about what it would be like if she wasn’t here, how it would feel to bury a friend and how I wouldn’t be able to see her anymore, it makes me want to ball my eyes out. So I’m sitting here with a million questions and wondering what the future is going to bring… I just pray that I can be a strong enough friend to help her get through this battle and when she beats it, we can sit back and feel peace with it. She’ll be in my prayers constantly…